Normally I try to keep the real venting to a minimum here but sometimes the SERIOUSLY? File in my brain gets way too full and I'm afraid I'm going to implode. So for the readers who like the snarky side of me, today is your Lucky Day!! First of all, let me just say it bugs the heck out me when someone walks into the shop and immediately screams HELLO? if they are not greeted within 1.2 milliseconds. I don't know why people treat antique stores differently then they would any business but seriously, Salvage Chic is over 2000 square feet and generally staffed by one person. Try walking into Jordan's Furniture and screaming HELLO? if Barry & Elliott don't immediately greet you; I'm pretty sure you'll look a little foolish.
Now, before you start thinking I'm a total jerk, I should mention that 10 times out of 10 when people come in and scream HELLO, it is followed by some really inane request. Like, "Those buoys that you have out front for $15 each, would you sell THREE for $15?" Ummm... No. "NO?" (incredulously) So incredulously, I felt like I needed to justify myself by saying that I probably paid more than that for them. "really? That's less than what you PAID for them? Do you mind if I ask where you GOT them?" Sure, we got them at an auction. "I see, really, and you can't sell 3 for $15, do you mind if I ask what you DID pay for them?" SERIOUSLY!! SERIOUSLY!! YES I DO MIND!! I mean, I'm all for haggling when I'm at a flea market or yard sale; but I would never insult someone with an actual business by offering them 1/3 of what they were asking and then act as if I were ENTITLED to it when they said no. Not even if I were in one of those antique shops that doesn't turn the heat on and gives you your stuff in their used grocery bags. I wanted to say "Hold On, let me call my landlord and see if he'll give me 3 months rent for the price of 1; and then negotiate 67% off of my telephone, internet and electric bills. You think the IRS would mind taxing me at 14% instead of 42% this quarter? Meanwhile why don't you go across the street to Cumby's and offer them 85 cents a gallon for gas and watch them laugh at you."
But I didn't. I decided the best way to end the conversation was to just re-state "The price of the buoys is $15 each." She left in a huff anyway; I guess I could've vented after all!