Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Wreath-Making 101

Sunday morning started off quietly at the shop so I decided to reward myself with a little glue gun therapy for having survived The-Most-Hectic-Saturday-EVER. I don't know why, but there's something mind-numbingly soothing about gluing sh*t onto a wreath. Not to put Xanax out of business or anything, but I thought I'd share the process with those of you who might need a prescription for some holiday fun.

Start by finding a location to hang the wreath that's close to an outlet to plug your glue gun into and a table or counter or something to put your stuff on. Mine just happens to be hanging over the fire extinguisher in the back room, that's not really a requirement but it did come in handy that one time... OK, you know what, you should definitely hang it over a fire extinguisher.

Here's where I act all organized enough to have actually compiled all of my ingredients ahead of time. I do recommend that you do that, but normally I seem to be rooting through 16 boxes of Ornamental Christmas Crap with one hand while dripping hot glue on myself with the other.

I generally start with a "centerpiece" and some large related ornaments spread in a somewhat orderly fashion around the wreath.

Then I get bored with the basic ornaments and start adding more interesting pieces.

Before I get to the next step MAKE SURE you have a pencil or stick or some other foreign body to poke & tuck the filler elements into the wreath. Otherwise I guarantee you are instinctively going to use your finger instead and there is a 99% chance you will come in contact with the hot glue. If this happens, just remember that the word to scream is "FUDGE!" Especially if there happen to be small children nearby.

Now for the fun part, I just keep willy-nilly adding whatever catches my fancy.

Eventually my gut, or more often Claudia, will tell me that I'm done before it goes too-over-the-top.

The last step is naming my creation. I like to keep the titles playful yet relevant. This wreath has a lot of tacky elements in it but the red velvet gives it some richness, so I'm calling it "Velveeta". Because it's kinda cheesy - but I secretly like it.


Anonymous said...

I heart this blog entry.

Glu-ing S**t to stuff...that is a book waiting to happen.

Good job.


cfb said...

You made me laugh out loud...again. I always drip glue then reach for it with my left hand then yell something close to "Fudge!" but not actually "Fudge" or "Frack" as they say on Battlestar Gallactica but some mixture of the two that does not seem to offend the cats. I may see you towards the end of the week...Friday...:-)

Ires said...

Oh this is so helpful thank you! Do you get your "starter" wreaths at Michaels, etc?
- Irene

Salvage Chick said...

Irene, you can use any type of starter wreath you can find. Don't feel like you have to buy the most lush & full wreath out there; WalMart has some nice scraggly Charlie Brown type wreaths for $2. The goal is to add so much ticky-tacky-vintage-goodness that you barely even see the greens. Good Luck if you make one, and Happy Holidays!!