Wednesday, August 29, 2007

The Mayor of Pembroke

Does Pembroke even have a Mayor? Do they need one? Either way I nominate Yard Sale Buddy! I always knew he was well-liked by his neighbors despite the state of his backyard, but yesterday my eyes opened up to a whole new level of his celebrity. I was taking a mid-morning break and he said "Do you want some Banana Cake, somebody dropped some off for me." No Thanks, I gotta get back to work... keep in mind the Dumpster was blocking my view of the street and the driveway, but all day long I heard people driving by calling out greetings, commenting on the Dumpster, exclaiming over the job he was doing on my Jeep, etc. Cut to mid-afternoon and I'm taking a much needed minute in the shade and he asks "Do you want some Raspberry Cake, somebody dropped some off for me." I thought it was Banana Bread? "No, that was earlier." Somehow throughout the course of the day a slew of tomatoes and also fresh eggs made it onto his porch. All those gorgeous plants and flowers in his front yard? Given to him in the Spring by random people who bought too many. I even watched the Enterprise News Delivery Guy get out of his van in 100 degree weather and WALK PAST Yard Sale Buddy to put the paper on his porch. Do you do that for EVERYONE? I exclaimed. "Oh NO, just him."

A Visit from the Enemy Camp

Mack finally showed up last night to retrieve those church benches, ONLY under threat of their imminent demise. (Remind me to call Yard Sale Buddy and tell him they will not be out on the curb tonight, after all - I think he was planning to pick them up.) So anyway Mack shows up unannounced and my Husband's all "the Red Sox just started, would you like a beer?" while I'm like, "can we get the show on the ROAD?" Of course, I did not have ample time to batten down the hatches before they got out to the backyard so Mack seized the opportunity to spy and comment on every little thing in my garage. "Oh, I see you took all the good stuff out of Yard Sale Buddy's Yard this week... nice bed, where'd you get that, was that from that cleanout... you know, all your garage needs is a little organization." I was reaching my boiling point; I take the so-called Good Stuff from Yard Sale Buddy's on SUNDAY NIGHTS after everyone has had ample time to buy it, mostly so it doesn't get rained on during the week; you know where I got that bed? At Nunya. As in None-ya-freaking-business where I got that bed; and as for the comments on my garage just needing a little organization... HAS HE SEEN HIS OWN SHOP?

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Comments on the Heavyweight Cleanout Match

"Oh GOD... this is his YARD? I thought these were pictures of the Halifax Recycling Center"
"Look at all this sh*t."
"What is that, some weird kind of MOTOR?"
"Jeeeeeesus."
"Yard Sale Buddy is Out of Control."
"I can see why people think his Yard Sale is a bunch of junk."
"He must have a nice market for all of those sleds right now in AUGUST."
"How many ladders does one person need?"
"What's with all the screens?"
"Thank god you had a hardhat on."
"No wonder you are so filthy every time you come home from there."
"and I thought our GARAGE was bad."
"It was definitely time for an Intervention."

and Finally... "Only ONE Dumpster?!?!?" and "only THIRTY Days?!?!?"

and all those were from my HUSBAND! Can you believe he's never seen Yard Sale Buddy's yard in person, he doesn't know what he's missing.

So what do you have to say about Yard Sale Buddy's Yard? Keep those comments coming.

World Heavyweight Championship - Cleanout Division

In this corner... we have Salvage Chick, armed with a hardhat Yard Sale Buddy custom-made for her and a DUMPSTER, tasked with cleaning Yard Sale Buddy's YARD including a tent that has not been empty since the Reagan Administration.



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And in the other corner, we have Yard Sale Buddy, armed with an arsenal of secret weapons, tasked with cleaning Salvage Chick's 2001 Jeep that has not been clean since the year 2000.















The YARD... we'll let this speak for itself.


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The TENT... and more of the Yard. Salvage Chick really has her work cut out for her.





















The JEEP... doesn't seem so bad right about now. Why didn't Salvage Chick just take it to the car wash and save herself all this grief?

















12:30 PM. All bets are off for those who voted "they will both lose interest by noon and give up to go trashpicking".



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The Tent and Yard AFTER... doesn't look MUCH different except hey, is that the actual Back Wall of the tent? And the dumpster is only 1/4 full, Salvage Chick has been economizing space and packing it like she's paying for storage by the square foot, plus she's got neat piles of cardboard, metal and wood set aside for drop off at various recycling centers.





















The Jeep AFTER. Alright, Salvage Chick concedes. Yard Sale Buddy may have won the Battle, but she will win the WAR! She has this dumpster for 30 days or til the yard's clean, whichever comes first; our money is on the 30 days.















2:30 PM, Quitting Time. Yard Sale Buddy treats to ice cream and HEY! Somewhere along the line he snuck off and filled Salvage Chick's GAS TANK which is perpetually only 1/4 tank full. Guess her day was not wasted after all, that works out to what, $8 bucks an hour?

Monday, August 27, 2007

Tune In Tomorrow

For Live Coverage of Salvage Chick and Yard Sale Buddy's EXTREME MAKEOVER CHALLENGE! (Ok more like Before and After photos but wouldn't Live Coverage be cool?) Today is your Last Chance to Vote, who will be the winner? Yard Sale Buddy details Salvage Chick's Jeep while she (GASP!) CLEANS HIS YARD! As of right now 4 Votes are In and everyone seems to think it will be a draw and we will give up by noon to go Trash Picking. Come to think of it even I voted for that, but that was BEFORE I had my secret weapon... A DUMPSTER! Now this is not a Done Deal yet and it may be some form of Insider Trading for me to tell you this, but I was over there today working on my Game Plan and if I played my cards right, I convinced Yard Sale Buddy nothing can save his yard but this $475 investment. He was dialing the phone as I left so if Lady Luck and the Dumpster Gods are on my side, I'm a shoe-in to win!

Sunday, August 26, 2007

Good Fences Make Good Neighbors

and hopefully so do Good No-Bark Electric Shock Collars. Yesterday I went to this yard sale 3 doors down from my house and introduced myself to the lady who just sold her house, she has been away traveling the country in her RV. She said "Oh yes, I've seen you walking by with your baby in the stroller." Ummmm, NO. But you've probably heard my dog... She was really nice, shaking her head saying "No, No, I just hear the dog next door sometimes." Ummmm, YES, that is actually my dog 3 doors down. I have heard her from the Stop & Shop parking lot way past here so I know you can hear her. While I was shopping we were chatting about how long it took the lady to sell her house and I was commenting how it's a shame no one wants Antique Houses, my next door neighbor and the one on the other side have been on the market for a while then I joked "maybe it's me" and you know what the lady said? "Actually... it's your DOG!" then she burst out laughing. She got me good for a minute though - but that's OK I scored some Awesome Vintage Christmas Ornaments from her!

Friday, August 24, 2007

Incognito

Yard Sale Buddy and I went down to that Estate Sale in Plympton today which I heard was quite a madhouse yesterday. I prefer to miss the choice finds and go late to maintain my sanity and well-being. We were able to browse in peace and I scored quite a few good finds; I thought the Dealer hosting the sale recognized me but it turns out he is old friends with Yard Sale Buddy so they were yukking it up while we checked out. The guy gave me a great deal on a lot of Shabby Chic frames and then he said to Yard Sale Buddy "these remind me of that Shabby Chick shop over in Bryantville near your house" HELLO I said, maybe it is ME reminding you of the shop because it is ME, SALVAGE CHICK! See, I told you this new haircut would come in handy for Undercover Operations.

After we left I wished we had more Friday Yard Sales to go to but Yard Sale Buddy said he checked and that was the only one. He has the worst eyesight so I grabbed the column and did a quick scan. "SEE, I knew you would miss one, look at this! Pembroke, Rte 14 Mattakeeset St across... from... Hosea's..." I was crestfallen. That is Yard Sale Buddy's House! Been there, done that.

I 'SHUTTER' to think...



...that some lady made her husband take these off their house and DISPOSE OF THEM!Luckily he had seen the Shutter Department outside the shop and thought maybe Salvage Chick could take them off of his hands. This is my favorite form of Recycling! Salvage Chic is not a Non-Profit Organization in the legal sense of the word but sometimes it darn near feels like one... Donations gratefully accepted!

Thursday, August 23, 2007

Wheelin' and Dealin'



That is what my friend Claudia is planning to do with her newly acquired 1974 GMC Rally Wagon! She's tired of sitting in a shop and will be running Rally Wagon Antiques Rescue (which is perfect since this a former fire rescue vehicle). I'm envisioning her pulling the van into her dealer friends' parking lots (preferably mine!) with lots of goodies to sell on the fly. Be sure to say Hi when you see her coming (from a mile away! and no I'm not being snarky I am Wicked Jealous of this vehicle.)

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Rude Awakening

The other day I was dropping off Yard Sale Buddy at his house after we visited our Hanover shop. This was a rare occurence because he almost always drives us around not only because he is obsessively proud of his truck but he is also a really nervous passenger. At least in my car. Just last week I was going 40 MPH on Route 106 and he was screaming SLOW DOWN THIS IS NOT THE INDY 500.

So anyway I pulled into his driveway and we were sitting there finishing the conversation we were having and suddenly Yard Sale Buddy's shoulders slumped and he said with total despair, "Look at My Yard". You have to read that with a waver in Ya-ard like he is about to cry. I started giggling. I'm sorry I just couldn't help it and anybody reading this who's seen Yard Sale Buddy's Yard is giggling too. I must have mumbled something like What About It or something because he went on and now he was stabbing his hands in the air "Look At It! Just Look At It!" acting like he left a Prize Rose Garden and came home to find goats eating it. I tried to tread lightly so as not to hurt his feelings so I took a deep breath and said "Well you do pride yourself on being the only 24/7 Yard Sale in Pembroke and it's not like all of this just showed up... while we were in HANOVER" and then dissolved into a fresh fit of giggles. "I mean, you must see this when YOU drive in here!" He's behaving like he's seeing his Yard Sale for the very first time and you know what his response was? "That's why I BACK in."

Monday, August 20, 2007

Salvage Chick Goes Global

So I was being a geek and Googled myself (come on, who HASN'T done that?) and this website comes up with the keywords "Meet Salvage Chick". Now I'm really curious so I open it up and pictures start popping up of this fabulous HUGE store in Canada. Over on the right there was a section "For those with a desire to see some Salvage Chic click these links", serious stuff like HGTV etc. and then one said "A great store in Maryland with a quirky attitude - meet Salvage Chick". My heart plummeted... there is a Salvage Chick in Maryland? With a quirky attitude? How Dare She? I have half a mind to go down there and kick her... wait a minute... (Click) it's linked to MY WEBSITE! How cool is THAT! Some shopowners all the way up in Canada found it and liked it so much they linked to it from their Very Popular website!

I wrote to them to thank them for the link and just in case they want to visit it is Massachusetts not Maryland... but I don't mind because I probably wouldn't have the foggiest notion what Canadian Postal abbreviations mean, ay?

Check it out: www.greenspotantiques.com

Sunday, August 19, 2007

Just When I Thought I'd Seen Everything

Whenever I'm at a Yard Sale, Flea Market, Thrift Store etc. and score a particularly good find I get this total sense of panic that someone is going to scoop it up from under me before I can safely pay and/or get it securely into my car. So I was at that Yard Sale Friday with Yard Sale Buddy where I found those shutters and I was really edgy because even though the one primary lady holding the sale knew everything we were buying there were Vultures Everywhere and our stuff was spread all over the place. I was anxiously fending one guy off from looking through 2 separate piles of Tonka trucks we'd set aside when I hear someone inquire "How much for this metal horse?" and the seller lady says "Oh that's his (as in Yard Sale Buddy); He bought that whole box." He DID? News to me. Next thing you know the Inquirer Of the Horse is asking Yard Sale Buddy how much he wants for it and then she starts pawing through the box so I'm standing there trying to load 23 shutters into Yard Sale Buddy's truck while simultaneously fending off Tonka Guy with a pair of mannequin feet and balancing a bird cage on my head. And I look around like Where The Heck is Yard Sale Buddy and he TOTALLY appears to be having his own Yard Sale, at someone ELSE'S Yard Sale! Now I really HAVE seen everything.

To give Yard Sale Buddy credit he really knew it was not kosher to be reselling things at someone else's Yard Sale, especially when he had not paid for them yet. So he gave the horse to the lady for nothing but when she started digging for more stuff I hear him saying "No, Sorry, those are for my friend over there she collects them." Huh? "Ahem, yes Salvage Chick, don't you want these for your dining room, you collect them?" I just wanted to get out of there so I looked over at whatever the stuff was and said "No" and Yard Sale Buddy's saying "Yes, you collect these remember, in your dining room?" (WINK WINK) Dawn breaks on my marble head "OH, yes, my DINING ROOM, I do collect those, sorry I thought you meant my... other dining room".

No wonder people think we're crazy.

Friday, August 17, 2007

I felt like the Karate Kid


or better yet the Yard Sale Kid! They say every mentor's proudest moment is when they recognize that their student has surpassed them in the very subject they have been sought to teach. Since I've been studying under the tutelage of Yard Sale Buddy I've started challenging myself at Yard Sales asking "What would Yard Sale Buddy find that I am missing?" Today we stopped at a Yard Sale and there was really good stuff at very decent prices; we kept going around and around adding to our pile and just when Yard Sale Buddy was reaching for his wallet to pay I said "WAIT! What about those shutters, are they for sale?" He looked over to where I was pointing behind the Yard Sale Goods; there was a big blue tarpaulin covering stuff not for sale and it was weighted down with these great old green shutters. The woman said Sure, then she quoted a price which I thought was for ONE shutter and it turned out to be for ALL of them which was TWENTY-THREE total and let me tell you, Yard Sale Buddy's face lit up like a Christmas Tree and he just patted me on the back and shook his head in awe saying "Beat at my own game!"

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Today's Million Dollar Question






What do you suppose my Husband is going to say when he sees Our Garage?!?!

Last week he was joking around about putting duct tape down the middle, reserving half for Salvage Chick's junk and half for his normal garage stuff like the lawn mower, yard tools etc. He even graciously offered "you can leave the dining table & chairs on my side in case I need to have an impromptu dinner party." Poor guy. Just yesterday he was so pleased to see me voluntarily cleaning it out, he was overheard saying "oh THERE's the riding mower" as he joyously reunited with it like an old friend. Little did he know I was secretly preparing for NEW ARRIVALS. I feel like such a sneak. Maybe he will not notice...

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Mission: Impossible




So much for keeping a Secret Mission SECRET, since the World's Most Alert Watchdog alerted the whole neighborhood, 3 surrounding towns and the media that SOMETHING is lurking in Salvage Chick's Backyard! To think before she joined C.S.I. Halifax her Obsessive Compulsive Disorder was wasted on menial things like letting me know someone refilled the gas grill tank and left it 3 inches to the right of where it usually resides. Lassie had nothing on Izzy; I mean I GUESS it's pretty smart to alert your owners when someone has fallen down a well but isn't it equally important to let them know when someone parks a U-Haul full of Serial Killers in the driveway? Or just a U-Haul... that I was hoping my Husband wouldn't notice. Yard Sale Buddy dropped it off in preparation for our Heist tomorrow so STAY TUNED... and don't even think about tailing us! We actually have several U-Hauls we will be using as decoy diversions so you'll just be wasting your time. And that Sleeping Watchdog only APPEARS to be passed out with U-Haul Induced Exhaustion.

Everything But the Kitchen Sink





You know how Salvage Chick loves a Challenge... so whoever made that snide comment about the shop having "Everything But..." a certain item can TRY AGAIN because yes, folks, we now have a Kitchen Sink!

I guess the guy who was peddling this made a stop over at Never Open first and was turned away because sure enough after I bought it my nemesis Mack was over chortling "I can't believe you bought that piece of junk". Hmph well I seem to remember a similar response when I purloined the Fridge out of Yard Sale Buddy's yard and THAT is the most exclaimed over item in the shop. Some people just have no vision!! And Hey, if all else fails, I can always sublet the shop as an efficiency apartment.

Thursday, August 9, 2007

The "A" List



Well apparently I did not make the list, at least according to Booth 10 at the Hexagon House! I was over there last week checking out Claudia's 50% Off Sale and remembered #10 had this whole suitcase full of type die letters for just 25 cents each so I decided to spell out Salvage Chic. Or maybe just Slvg Chc? Where the heck were Pat and Vanna when I wanted to buy a vowel? Finally I had everything I needed except 1 A. I swear I rooted in that suitcase for a half hour and convinced myself this was a Diabolical Scheme of the Booth 10 Sisters in retaliation for exposing the fact that they stole my Yellow Pot from Yard Sale Buddy's. Or bought it... whatever! Anyway I rooted around in there for a HALF HOUR, my hands were filthy and I was sure the lady at the desk was gonna come up and charge me RENT I was there so long, and finally, TA DA... thought I came up with a lowercase a. More likely a Capital D but it works.

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

PROHIBITED



I bounded home excitedly with this sign the other day and proudly showed it off to my Husband. His reaction was a confused look so I said "well we certainly don't want any of these things in our yard, DO WE?" He cast a nervous sidelong glance at our dog whom some have likened to a Horse and sheepishly replied... "good point".

Monday, August 6, 2007

To Sell or Not to Sell...


There is No Question! This is a Keeper.

What did the camera miss today? Salvage Chick and Yard Sale Buddy knee deep in a dumpster. Well really, we were standing on stuff outside the dumpster looking in but it still would've made for a good photo. It turned out to be Slim Pickins so we headed South on our planned adventure to try to bilk this guy out of a big wooden fish sign Yard Sale Buddy has his eye on. The seller in his 10 Gallon Hat wants $300 but Yard Sale Buddy only wants to spend $10 and they can't seem to meet in the middle. I was calmly amassing a pile of things while the negotiations continued and Mr. 10 Gallon so wanted to piss off Yard Sale Buddy he was putting Fire Sale Prices on anything I wanted because I was "more polite and better looking" than Yard Sale Buddy. So this lovely old wrought iron lantern, with unbroken amber glass panels and in working condition? ONE DOLLAR!!! and the kicker? Yard Sale Buddy paid for it.

Friday, August 3, 2007

A Hard Day's Morning

I have Beatles on the brain because Yard Sale Buddy and I went Yard Sale-ing this morning and before I tell you about our adventures let me say his taste in music needs a little broadening. After we listened to Penny Lane for the umpteenth time he says "Feel free to change the CD, there's a bunch of music in there". So I delve into the console and come up with this FAT CD wallet, there must be 50 in there, and start flipping. Greatest Hits of the Beatles... The Beatles Greatest Hits... More Great Hits of the Beatles... and HEY here's something, Songs the Beatles Didn't Even Know They Sang! Oh boy. Strawberry Fields and Beatles Forever.

The crazy thing about Yard Saleing with Yard Sale Buddy is his talent for discovering things the owners didn't even know they had, let alone consider selling. He actually tried to buy the shutters off of someone's house today and I think they were entertaining the idea until the wife said "We don't actually own the house."

We were at this inside yard sale and it was really kind of junky like the people put stickers on everything in their house in hopes of making the mortgage,i.e. 'let's see if we can get 25 cents for this half burned Yankee Candle with soot all over the jar'. So I'm gazing at all this holiday crap and Yard Sale Buddy pipes up (mind you the Homeowner is in between him and me) "HEY SALVAGE CHICK, look at this, I think we should get it for Claudia, she loves Christmas Stuff" he is holding this God-Awful Holiday Flag and I'm trying to politely say No, I think she likes more of a Vintage thing, I'm not sure that's up her alley, etc etc. He just keeps repeating himself REALLY LOUD and finally I look over and see he is silently laughing his arse off watching me suffer.

So back to his Talent at Finding Things. We go into the next room and Yard Sale Buddy sees a guy coming in through a closed door so he tries to go in there and the Owner jumps up and says "NOSORRYTHATROOM'SNOTPARTOFTHESALE... unlessyouwanttolookatoldrecords." Which of course is exactly what he likes to look at so I have to spend 20 minutes futzing around wondering Just Who Would Want to Buy Half a Bottle of Khalua? and then back comes Yard Sale Buddy with... SURE ENOUGH... a Beatles Album!!

Thursday, August 2, 2007

Breaking and Entering

Well technically it wasn't a true B&E because I have a key but it sure felt like it. I took Yard Sale Buddy up to My Favorite Place in Hanover to help me revamp my booth and he started casing the joint looking for things that had been purchased from his Yard Sale. It was like watching a mother gravitate towards her long lost children but I was like "Come ON, it's a watering can without the sprinkle spout, it can't possibly be the one you sold in 1987!" Just when I thought we were getting out of there safely he said "Woah-HO, what's this room, Cracks & Crevices Consignment... this was mine, you think I should take it and try to sell it to her again at my Yard Sale?" Oh. My. God. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" I bustled him outta there but not before I frisked him and passed him through a metal detector.

Extreme Makeover

WOW People are getting restless that I haven't Blogged in a while, rumors are circling about Salvage Chick having "Writer's Block" and/or being committed to rehab again for picking Yard Sale Buddy's trash... I assure you, NONE of it is true! I have just been busy Taking Care of Stuff behind the scenes during my days off. IMPORTANT Stuff like... a new Hair-do! It is a Drastic change designed to allow me to yardsale/dumpster dive for at least 2 weeks without being recognized. Even my husband did not recognize me, he said his first thoughts were "what is Posh Spice doing walking down my driveway in Halifax?" This morning Yard Sale Buddy took me over to Rockland to pick up a Fire Extinguisher for the shop, ordered by the Pembroke Fire Dept after their surprise inspection and just in time according to Yard Sale Buddy because this new haircut is "Smoking"; he was so distracted by it he missed a perfectly good Trash Pick on the way home! Don't worry, I made him turn around.